Yanstebangus: Poll Position, Part 4: Novelty

To long-time fans, new readers, and disclaimer geeks, one and all, welcome. You may ask “why” after reading this gratuitous post. Let’s suffice to say it’s because someone’s got to bring the quality of writing down around here, and I have a reputation to uphold. Granted, it’s not nearly going as [...]

Yanstebangus: Poll Position, Part 3 (Generation Why)

I looked up, and, to my shock and dismay, my ex-wife was there. “Geez,” I said, “first, no pudding at lunch and now this. What’s the matter, overdrawn at the blood bank?”

And Now, A Word From Mal-Wart Stupor-Centers

CONSUME!

Yanstebangus: Poll Position, Part 2 (Subterfuge In D Minor)

Obsidian. That must have been what the walls were covered with in the stairwell. The steps themselves were black granite, filled with light and dark shades of gray pebbles. They were cut square and polished to a mirror finish. The walls, also, were mirror-polished, showing warped, obscure reflections in their inky blackness.
The stairwell was lit [...]

Yanstebangus: Poll Position Pt. 1

“OK, Murray, here’s the gag. Reality show, OK? We get this nut job to put together four of the world’s favorite pop musicians, under the pretense he’s putting together a super-group. Then, when everything looks like it’s going great, POW! ZOK!”
The sudden burst of ebullience and wild gesticulation made the bespectacled Murray [...]

A Wordchasm Public Service Announcement

Do you have what it takes to be a crossing guard?
Stopping traffic… guiding pedestrians… facing down screaming death machines, hurtling their way toward your extended, white-gloved hands, when all that stands between the huddled, shuffling masses of kiddies and certain doom is you… and your whistle.
We salute these Everyday Heroes… folks like Edgar J. Birdwhistle, [...]

Scurvy State

In the year 2012, one year after Pirates VII made box office history, the first ever official School for Pirates opened in St. Augustine, Florida. Scurvy State offered a one year online degree fueled by the “all-in-one” mail order Sea Simulator 3000. While Sea Sim I and II were marketed exclusively by Tony Robbins’s 90-minute [...]