Not the Man
By julius
When did being a white man become a crime against humanity?
I sifted through the remains of the decimated Sunday paper. The headlines were mostly negative, as expected. There seemed to be a common theme uniting them, though: Man-hating was hot. For some reason, pundits couldn’t understand that I find Hillary Clinton disingenuous; apparently the fact that she’s a woman was more important in their eyes. Same thing with Sex and the City. Just disliking the movie apparently was a sign of blatant sexism.
Even seemingly gender-neutral news like oil prices were laced with anti-white male rhetoric: “It’s just the man profiting off us,” one young student lamented. I immediately felt burdened with years of other people’s shortcomings. This must be what a heart attack is like. Good thing I’m not so old yet.
Perturbed and a little sweaty, I threw the pile of paper into the garbage. “At least I know how I really feel,” I consoled myself as I ate some granola. I thought about turning on the television, but decided that the media gods were probably conspiring against me and opted for my iPod instead. Unfortunately, Steve Jobs and company must have thought my misery funny as Alanis Morissette came on to remind me that she’d go down on me in a theater. I quickly skipped to the next song. Jim James’ wail always soothes my nerves, and all was right for a few bites as I finished breakfast.
I thought about taking a walk around the lake, and eventually settled on that as a decent plan of action. There’s usually a nice breeze coming off of the water and the sun was shining. What could go wrong? Plenty, it seemed. Just being alive was enough to offend many by the water. I could feel the glares from old and young alike as I ambled along the shoreline, their well-shaped eyebrows forming a sea of scowls.
Maybe I’ll just go home. Naps are always nice on a Sunday. I’ll just have to gamble that my subconscious won’t work against me as well.
June 11, 2008 - 12:21 pm
yes, a dangerous game. i believe this is what john edwards was referring to early on in his campaign. he, however, did not put it as gracefully as senator cook.
“man” is so vaguely defined that we often find ourselves fending off barbs meant for our parents’ generation. i find myself muttering, “trust me, i get it,” three or four times every day.
June 11, 2008 - 1:33 pm
It’s really not a great time to be a normal white guy. We bear all of the burden for generations of men that we didn’t even know and have the completely unrealistic label from every “minority,” which these days amounts to everyone that isn’t a white man according to most definitions, that they’re somehow rigging the system to keep others out. It’s like reverse discrimination sometimes, and some people feel like they need to take it a step further and hate you personally in addition to a broader societal hatred against anyone with light skin and a penis. Sometimes it just makes a guy feel really cornered.
June 11, 2008 - 1:51 pm
i definitely get the whole concept of white male privilege for certain. i also feel my share of white, liberal guilt for things, as you’ve mentioned, that are beyond my control. it’s the piled on guilt that causes these special encounters. we are the first generation to grow-up reading about the ridiculously messed up things that our white, male ancestors did. walking around with this guilt all the time actually does nothing to help equality. instead, it ups the tension.
we should have been forced to take classes on self-forgiveness in addition to “why you suck because of your ancestors 101.”
July 4, 2008 - 7:28 am
The saddest part of “we’re all in this together” is that we are, and nobody sees it! The beauty of equality would be that everyone would be on the level playing field, not pushing anyone back down to “substandard.” It’s why I kind of cringe watching Homer Simpson… we’re kind of programming ourselves to be Stupid Dads, ya know…?
:-/
July 4, 2008 - 7:30 am
PS, there’s no “reverse” to discrimination– discrimination/racism/sexism/religionism/sizism are all isms of their own, no matter who’s doing it to whom!
July 7, 2008 - 9:55 am
@ sheckyMerman: I agree totally on the lowest common denominator / substandard comment. Unfortunately, most people see society as a zero-sum experience where they have to take from someone else in order to advance. The “me first” attitude that these people adopt unfortunately holds everyone back and keeps a lot of the racial and social boundary lines in place by perpetuating the situation.
With regard to “reverse discrimination” I was using the term to describe the condition of discriminating because you think you’re being discriminated against. I certainly understand that discrimination is discrimination whoever is doing the discriminating.
July 13, 2008 - 7:51 am
Oh, yeah, Julius, right on, I agree! I get philosophical with this stuff. I’ve seen some instances of “inverse racism,” as I have called it. I have some acquaintances who can’t see that some people of other races do indeed do bad things, or can do no wrong (even when they do wrong, of course not because of their race, but because of their criminal activities).
It definitely can be maddening!