Out on the late fringes of Spring, Hoosiers keep a low profile. No basketball, no soccer — only a  warming groundhog’s snowball could effect the slow pulse of May in Bloomington, Indiana. On Reclamation Sunday, our tiny, liberal, mid-western oasis breathes a sigh of relief. Student exodus turns down the volume; bike lanes reappear; adolescent angst loosens its firm grip and BLOOM.

But, 2008 has been different. Soundbyte hungry media locusts viciously rampaged unabated — threats by television, radio, and yes…the world wide web.

This May, our collective blood boiled for change. We threw down our frisbees and flip-flops. Our ice cream cones melted in the streets to the sound of a third chin foreshadowing in the wind. The Tower of Limbaugh called out: “Cross the picket fence.” These ominous tones struck a chord in all surrounding Limburgs. Shotguns cocked, amens exclaimed, and our fate was sealed.

It’s almost June and we feel dirty. No amount of showering seems to tame the foul odor of status quo. Though FOX is not clever it’s still in my hair. ABC’s waste lies like a brick in my stomach. CNN has blackened my lungs and ruptured my ears.

My flip-flops are back, but I’m Dennis Kucinistench. What about the war? What of education? Tiny and ineffective, I’m just freshening up. Where is Spring and what went wrong?