Discovery Blastoff
Nov 30th
A Chapter
Charlotte contorted her face in horror. Her mind clicked into overdrive. What looked like pain on her face was actually disgust, mingled with relief. Facial expressions are often misconstrued. Charlotte, or Cherri as many called her, used this to her utmost advantage.
Sharise continued her rhythmic ride on top of Feensley’s large, jiggling body. Only [...]
Interlude
Nov 29th
“Yeah, I spent eighteen months in Nam.”
“What did you do there,” I asked.
“I killed people.”
I didn’t know what to say, I had never heard anybody admit to killing people before. But Rich was not just anybody, he was different; always quiet and reserved, he always kept to himself even when the bar was crowded [...]
Appointment
Nov 28th
A Chapter
Dr. Feensley entered his office and flipped the lights on. “What a great meeting,” said Feensley aloud. He sat down in his chair with a magnanimous thud.
“Good morning, Doug,” said Sharise as she entered the room. “Excellent sermon Saturday…it made me feel so alive.”
Her pale skin glistened as she glided around the room. The [...]
Graham Cracker
Nov 27th
He told stories; nobody listened. His hair already gray. He wore tidy English corduroys.
He skipped in the park, made obtuse remarks.
You punched him. Ouch.
Propranolol
Nov 26th
James arrived at the Washington-Dulles airport still wearing his uniform. Dusty rocks and shrapnel slid to and fro in his duffel bag. His sunburnt, windblown skin still ached despite repeated aloe applications. He held a collage of grieving tears at bay — smiling at his family and their joy.
Months later he woke up naked in [...]
Leverage
Nov 21st
Concept by BWC
Elizabeth had always wanted a big diamond since as long as she could remember. She gazed down at it now and wept.
She knew what she had to do. The ring slid off her finger — a perfect fit. The pawn shop wouldn’t give her any grief. Joe had always liked her. He liked [...]
Atheism and Insomnia
Nov 21st
Alex lay in bed staring at the black ceiling as he had numerous nights before. Usually, he scurried around the house finishing as many self-imposed chores as possible until he fell into bed and passed out from exhaustion. Sometimes he preferred to watch movies into the wee hours of the night. He drifted off to [...]
Make Me a Channel of Your Piece
Nov 20th
Oh, Saint Metzler, blessed father of hobby, deliver us wood, so that we may build.
You giveth not a dull knife, and carry not one. Blessed be and forgive our enemies, for they not know what they sell.
Deliver us from toys, and forgive those who mix dope and foam. Gaze down upon us with your reading [...]
The Hobbytown Massacre
Nov 19th
The party was definitely over. Glenn Scott Clarksmith had forgotten to take his medication. Larry was pissed. Eric used to be a doctor. The past tense did not affect his performance. He sedated Glen Scott quite easily. So easily, in fact, he had it done in less than a [...]
Muddy Buddy
Nov 18th
Creslin Johns sat cozily reclined in front of the television. He was impatiently sucking down his steaming Hungry Man dinner when he heard a rustling outside. His motion detector bulb flickered on and off. A drop of hot gravy sizzled down from his chin and onto his lap. He grabbed a rifle from the rack [...]
Hugo Chumley
Nov 16th
My given name is Hugo, but I changed it to Ray Liotta. It’s a big kick at the cop conventions. Someday I’ll make the force. But now? I’m takin’ it easy. Livin’ in Miami and partying with all the fine ladies. I’ve got a brand new moustache — named it Trevor.
Trevor and I usually hit [...]
Diary of Ms. Van Tassel
Nov 15th
by Abby Koop
October 11, 1816
Dear Diary,
Abraham stopped by for a chat again today. His horse ride here had given him a sort of stormy, unrefined look, and yet he still managed to maintain a perfectly graceful sort of aura. When I told him so, his face turned bright red.
I am quite certain I strike [...]
Evening
Nov 14th
. . . . .. A sunny summer Saturday in the Sunshine State held to its reputation until evening when M. and T. met with A. and her childhood sweetheart now spouse. M. was asked to pull together an appropriate fetish outfit with very little notice and a lot of anxiety. A serendipitously packed shiny [...]
Nuclear Products
Nov 14th
Critically acclaimed Flemish nuclear physicist Basti Valentino loved the little particular things in life. Maybe it’s because he was big — Seven foot, six to be exact.
It was his healthy obsessive compulsive disorder that led him to Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. His highly promising, award winning research on cold fusion had come to a standstill. At [...]
Cold Feet
Nov 13th
Inspired by the BWC
Chad woke up in the dark. He managed a moan — the brilliant moonlight shimmered off the snow and into his watering eyes. Then he remembered: the expert slope.
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP THERE, CHAD!?” screamed Mrs. Johnswick.
“I’m totally going to wail on this hill, Mom!” He rolled up the sleeves of [...]
Moons Over Thurzday Scramble on Friday
Nov 11th
Greetings Marshanners,
Today’s word is and ancient one from the Hicko scrolls.
!NAHESDK TI
Hint: disheartening acknowledgement of failure by a third party
Hint: words uttered by a famous play by play announcer
Young Sally, Young Billy
Nov 9th
Sally and Billy Whitebread hung their heads.
“But, Rummy is my Godfather!” whined Billy.
“Who will teach those extremists a lesson?” wondered Sally.
“I dunno.” he moped. “I can’t believe they are so convinced about their religion that they bomb us over there. What did we good Christians ever do to them?”
TELEVISION PLAYING IN BACKGROUND
A guided missile took [...]
Me & Ted:
Nov 7th
Me & Ted: Selected Short Stories of Self-Loathing v.1
Last stretch of the run.
As Caleb approached the rotting hollow pine, he knew it would only take him about 3 ½ minutes to reach the end of the trail. He dialed his mp3 player over the song. He always ended his run with the [...]
In the Bush
Nov 7th
Dick and the gang had just finished their git’n’R-DUN GOP rally tour. They were rolling along singing dixie when Dick got a hankerin’ for some duck.
“Over there!” he snarled. The driver of the gas guzzling carbon monster swerved across two lanes of traffic and into the Tennessee thicket. Rummaging through the row of seats behind [...]
Storage
Nov 6th
Woke up in a giant vacuum.
The machine hum between my ears was unbearable. Darkness lurked all around. Through the auditory debris, I could hear things breaking…things falling. Small animals — somehwere — were scurrying.
A small beam of dusty light shot through a crack in what must have been a window. I scrambled to my supposed [...]
Moons Over Thurzday Scramble
Nov 4th
by Doug Ullrich
Welcome, Marshanners! It’s Thursday!!
Here is your word (or words).
Hicko used to bark out this one during one of his most violent and spastic of dance routines…….
OTLTA ICTNOOPR ERLSVERA
Hint 1. Horrible sounding, unnatural scientific occurence.
Hint 2. Bill Murray
Hickopedia Marshannika
Nov 4th
by Douglas Ullrich
How do you like the hobby called Marshann so far? Marshanning began along time ago at a place called Hensley Morsel just south of Bent Armpit, Wyoming. A group of severely lexicdis beardos were bored with there leisure activities of yodeling and scab collecting. One beardo had the spiritual fortitude [...]
All Aboard
Nov 2nd
I’d taken the lowest garbage fare I could find. Local airports aren’t cheap. They squeezed me into the way-back — the row of seats behind beverage station. Front-row seat for the mile-high club…
I couldn’t take my eyes off the young woman hobbling her skirt back down. That is, until the plane shifted. It wasn’t like [...]
